Tuesday, October 28, 2008

91

I'm the guy in the tuxedo, riding the pink bird.
Knight vs Phoenix Showdown!

Final results of day tournament (wins) : Me 26 - 11 JJ
Owned him by 15 games...thought of going for 20 but time was too constrainted..
JOIN ME IN GUNBOUND! OR DIE!


>>>Gunbound Rocks<<<

>>>I Pebbles!<<<

lol

ok today's maths trial was "HOLY F**KIN SHIT B*TCHASS NAB*I INTERESTING!"

ok you were there, you get the point...

lol...

after many many experiences you gotta agree that the school is not really the most competent of bitchasses in planning activities...but of course we cant always ask for the best..

wasted time at vivo...but good thing is that "I'M WALKING IN VIVO! HOLY SHIT THIS IS COOL MAN!" quoted by .... .... me... lol

yep...the light! the open spaces! the restaurants! the view of sentosa! the la senza shop! lol jk jk

ah.. but getting out there to walk around "WITHOUT THEM" is kinda unique...i know walkin arnd with them is quite alright...but without makes it so much more fun..lol not criticising them but....yeah...much more comfortable with friends...

hmm...bus trips are fun, you get to emo, play cards, mess around in seats, gl the instructor, gl other ppl (shing chun)...and try to lip sync violent rap songs...lol

hmm nearly thought i lost my shoe bag...but luckily was saved by "OH YOU ARE LOVED!"...

hah..thanks a lot anyways..

but cant go to training in the end...the back sprain feeling as worse as ever..

played around with some gigantic box of muffins...i think you all should have seen..

*KING OF MUFFINS*

lol...muffin is a funny word...so is bun...pastry...lol..

check out dr tran - the little cinammon bun...on youtube...its freakin cute and nice..

hmm...green tea is now my favourite drink..lol

report book...

SCREW

actually not la...i'm not really happy with the grades...but not really pissed either...at least got improvement...

B
B
B
B
B
C

lol... 2.67...exactly same as last year...

and wo0ts i passed my maths! the c lol

i got the EXACT same percentage as michelle...62.03...ar but screw the GPA system ya know? i wont reveal michelle's GPA here..otherwise she might come find me...(actually it wont make much of a difference...lol)

SCREW GPA!

lol nvm...

OPTION 3B IS WHAT YOUR HEART DESIRES!

JOIN THE LEGION OF THE KING AND CONTINUE HIS RULE! WITH OPTION 3B

by the way rmb to fill out your form...the streaming options...tmr..

hmm...

YES CHECK OUT EVE ONLINE VIDEOS ON ITS WEBSITE! THEY ARE DAMN COOL, FREAKING NICE!

MRT today was ok...with toon,kim,jialing,michelle

nearly wandered off to "inappropriate topics" because of kim siang...as usual..lol..

i think thats about it for today...

oh here's just one nice song for ya

The Masterplan - Oasis

its a nice emo song..the tune and guitar is very nice...extremely musical...if i can say that..

oh yes and "now or never" in HSM 3 is a nice song...

Now I feel nothing when you are gone. YES! But its for now only, now.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

90

wassup y'all...

let me talk abt today..

got screwed in the hall for more than 5 hours...

got a back cramp after 4 hours...

got a leg cramp when standing up after 5 hours...

now back aching...

screw dhs...no fucking brain on how to keep students alive but got alot of brains on how to kill their goddamn students

hmm...i shall not emphasize...you all should know the fucking school liao...lols...damn shuang sia...5 hours being screwed in the hall

eh...training today...

kinda slacky...nothing much to say..except that the OFS centre is holy shet...abt as tall as my father...and speaking of that...

they will be off for 4 days...until tuesday that is...when my father comes back...so its gonna be a fun weekend...

lets plan an outing...it will be my 3rd outing this year...thats not bad...
lets plan 2 outings...
alright i guess 3 is alright...
ah 10 la...

lol..

anyways...i discover the magic of being alone...watching tv...5 o clock shadow...

dinner for one

hmm...

nothing much to post now...and going soon ba...cuz even if they are not here dosent mean they didnt install cameras in the house...and things are not quite easy for me...nvms! i shall not emo...its a time to be happy!

lets end this post with a favourite songs section

i got some new tunes that you might wanna check out:

1) Hero - Nas ft. Keri Hilson...the beat and background music is damn cool...so are the vocals...quite a club techno tune...rap song

2) Turn Heads - Dem Franchize Boyz ft. Lloyd...its an excellent combination of soul, jazz and rap

3) The Next Episode - Dr. Dre ft. Snoop Dogg...some cool rap song...seriously this is nice...damn nice...especially the intro..

thats about the new tunes in my phone...check out the others..


- Dead and Gone - T.I. ft. Justin Timberlake
- LAX Files - The Game
- The Lovers are Losing - Keane
- Bottle Pop - Pussycat Dolls ft. Snoop Dogg
- Hip Hop is Dead - Nas

and my most played song rising up recently is Closer by Ne-Yo...the song is DAMN NICE...lol...

anyways good night...have fun

Sunday, October 19, 2008

89

sup all...i just wanna come here to apologise to anyone i've pissed off with my msn chats or blog posts...cuz life aint workin out for me right now and even after EOY is life still kinda fucked up...getting back papers tmr...

anyways...sorry bout anything i've said to piss you off..i'm tryna change that but its kind hard at the moment...where life is no better after EOYs...but i believe that i will one day have my goddamn freedom and go out like you all...and i'm workin for it..

this is short...

sorry for everything and i will stop talking or blogging shit about my life..

thanks and see ya

Friday, October 17, 2008

88

evening ya'll...if you detest emo-ness or chim language, pls leave now..cuz the post below is goin to be somethin liddat..i dun want you all to get ideas against me if you dislike my views..

sup y'all...i suppose ya'll are preparin for the ginormous outing tmr? i suppose so..toon's list on the sms is huge! (by my standards that is..maybe not for you)
i was invited..but for no particular point..cuz you will be wasting your sms..i'm helpin ya to save some $$..so unless i suddenly become so free to be able to play more than 2 hours of psp a day...you know my parents have unlocked some chains..so maybe you should sms me at that kinda time..not now..

hmm...nothing much to do at home now..except 2 hours of psp a day and 2 hours of com a day..not bad eh? 4 hours of digital entertainment a day..its not bad for me..i don't wanna find out how much you ppl get to make you feel that its "not bad", let alone the amount you want to make you feel that its "good"..

hmm...i'd rather lose some of my psp and com time to come out with ya'll and have some fun out there..i'd rather not be rotting at home like some game addicted bastard with no life at all...

so how's your life now? after the EOYs? i suppose its good...compared to me i guess...but maybe its just not enough for you eh?

hmm...i suggest you start appreciating what you have..and stop complaining abt your boredness...and i know i am contradicting myself...as i am complaining abt my life as well..BUT...are you trying to make a difference? i am...even though its probably impossible...for years i have endured..and for even more years had i been an idiot and thought my life was great...

from P1 to P5...i gave no thought abt life...and thought my life was great...as i thought i only sufffered minor setbacks...

from p6, i started thinking...why is it that they can have this and i cannot? why is it they everyone has more freedom than me?

i started to rebel, and it was a mistake...from this point on, nearly everything was gone..1 outing...JUST 1 OUTING...in the entire year of p6...and only chances for a couple of sneaks...

Sec 1 - 3 approved outings...plus about 10 sneaks...thats an amazing record...as the 1.5 hours travelling time bt sch and jail gave me plenty of opportunities...

Sec 2 - 2 approved outings so far..and thats EDS night...and it wasnt technically an outing either...i pretended that it was compulsory...and related to sch stuff...so they probably wont let me out if it was just plainly for recreation...and i had abt 2 sneaks...one in the first sem and 1 during the mrt breakdown at bugis...

hmm...actually the emoness dont only come from the lack of outings...actually...if you all had the same amount of outings as me (even though you probably would have been dead under those conditions), i will feel perfectly fine...

i won't deny that i harbour large amounts of jealousy for you all...being able to have fun freely and with friends...i'm not addressing the general public out there...as i know some suffer the same conditions as me...someone similar would be jj...and shing chun...

so its mainly the fact that you all can have fun and i can have less which is making me such a bastard...

youall tell me to ask..and ask i did...but to no avail...i see no point wasting my breath and a chance for more now...as everything is stacked against me...i used to cherish a small slice of hope that i can come out for half an outing...but now i fall into hopelessness...not anger or annoyance... now i feel HOPELESS.

am i asking for too much? 1 GOD DAMN OUTING SO FAR IN THIS YEAR? AND IF YOU COULD CALL IT 1 OUTING...MAYBE HALF OF AN OUTING?

i know they probably wont read this...i trust my readers to keep my blog a secret from them...thank you all for making this blog possible for more than a year now...

am i an annoyance for lamenting about my unchangable life?...probably... so i am going to spout it all out for now...

Reasons to emo abt my life :

1) Lack of outings
2) Most ppl having more outings than me
3) Jealousy sustained from experience
4) Less amount of fun received compared to others
5) Lack of people with similar experiences to talk to and share our stories(jj and sc so far...sometimes michelle)
6) General lack of freedom (tv, time alloted for reaching home, time alloted for going out etc.)
7) No house key
8) No privacy (daily inbox raids, bag raids, wallet raids etc)
9) No chance to defend myself, or speak my thoughts
10) All causing a sense of hopelessness for life, and a loss of hope to continue living

i think thats SOME of it...i have much to lament about...but little to do to change it..

think of it...try placing yourself in my life...and see how you feel...i know its going to be hard imagining destroying your own life and ending up in mine...but try...and if you succeed...it will be like a realistic horror movie which will never end...

speaking of movies...you all have fun watching the hottest blockbusters tgt eh? i think some of you have watched enough tgt to write books on movie reviews...

but...on the not so dark side (but not bright)...i've got the psp so far...2 hours a day...and the com (2 hours a day), and plenty of channels on the tv (currently no limit set) wo0ts! its not bad already...considering my life's usual circumstances...but probably a killer for you? hmm...

anyways..have fun trying to empty those wallets which will never be thinned, and have fun watching those movies which will never end, and have fun going on outings which fun is infinite...and the amount of freedom you receive from your parents is infinite...

have fun...and good night..

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

87

its over..

0 days, 0 hours, 0 mins, 0 seconds..

but things will never turn out the way i want it...

tell me...you all reading this now...

how does it feel to be subjected to something you do not like?

how does it feel to be subjected to something you dislike, and not having even a shred of chance to speak for yourself?

not a chance to let the authority know what you think?

imagine yourself in this situation : you are told on your first day after your exams that you are to go to somewhere you dislike and do something you dislike for 2 weeks, starting from the exact first day of your holidays...it has been settled for you 4 weeks ago and you are not told about it...but by now, the decision and order is laid and you there is no way you can change it...?

how would you feel? if you do not have a chance to let your thoughts and feelings be known?

how would you feel? if you have no choice but to do something you dislike?

how would you feel? if nobody is giving you a chance to let you tell them your thoughts and feelings? not a chance at all...they just do everything without consulting you at all and the consequences of the thing is your responsibility...how would you feel?

how would you feel? if no thought is given to you at all? your words will never be heard, and others place their interests above yours?

honestly, how would you feel?

what a nice way to start a life after EOY...

today...

got sun tanned for interclass...and had stomachache on the train and was feeling very ill at home...

had a heated debate with jiajian just now about class bonding...for more details ask me and maybe i will upload a copy of the debate here...

let me tell you first that this debate does not look pretty and can be pretty hurtful to some...

also be warned that this debate contains chim language, and the meanings behind the words are reaching the threshold of emoness...

and i'm not going to school tmr...mother dun let...say i must rest of this lil bit of sickness...

nvm.. i appreciate the thoughtfullness...sorry to all...i am not there to support you all...for interclass...btw i want to congrats both teams on getting into 2nd round...

i have set some goals during the holidays to pass the time well...and not let it go to waste...as jj mentioned that this time is much more boring than he thought...so i suppose i have to agree with him on that...

Goals for hols :

1) Master the song Free Loop - Daniel Powter on piano
2)Master the song Bad Day - Daniel Powter on piano
3)Master the song Because of You - Neyo, piano version
4)Find more piano versions of popular songs to learn
5)Plan my ways to accomplish future dreams, lifelong ambitions
- Live in Los Angeles
- Open a cafe and live in an apartment in downtown LA
- Be a pianist in a club in LA
- Drive a Chrysler 300 with 24 inch rims

i know they are far fetched and i dunno why i'm obsessed with los angeles...but i will work towards those dreams...

i will post more tmr...good night for now..

Monday, October 6, 2008

86

sup...i know this is not a time for blogging but i just happened to feel that sept 9 has been there for too long...lols...tmr is hist...and i can't stop thinking of mrs kang when i think of history...lols... LA essay was fine... me and ant chose comparison..wo0ts...and me and jl chose qn 7 0.o..its not very common for ppl to choose that one lols...so we're quite isolated..

chinese compo was gay..no time at all...chionged some shit and slacked for 15 mins doing litarally nothing in the middle of the exam..screw...

after hist is geog...and after geog is LA and Chi... then science and the holy shit maths and we are done...

current countdown... 182.5 hours...keep counting folks...

hope are all are doing fine...which i doubt..and neither do i...so have fun mugging (technically mugging is not a word in the dictionary)

14/10/2008, 10.45 am
A King's World Premiere
It's something big...
REAL BIG.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

85

we may all die tonight...

i don't know...

nobody knows...

if not tonight then its next month...

or next year...

or 21/12/2012...

or sometime in 2049...

i don't know...

i'm not even 14...

i havent that yet...

but if i die tonight...

and you don't...

i just want you to know...

...

even so...

we would probably all die together...

good night...

screw french scientists fooling around with a 27 kilometer wide donut...

maybe...

the script i memorised will never be read out...

i had never appreciated life like this...

all the little things...

maybe i will see you tomorrow...

maybe i will not...

let's just wait...

you'll never know...

good night

Monday, September 8, 2008

85

sup peeps...i know i havent posted for hell long ...and i have no time to reply to tags nor to post much..i'm sorry for the people who asked me to link them..i will try to find time before or after the dreaded EOY's...if i would choose to describe it my way..it will be !@#$%^&^%$#@$%^&*()&*^%$#...yeah you get the point..





we may die in 2 days time...if the donut particle accelerator do create a black whole to kill us all..at least no EOY...





seriously i'd rather die than to suffer from the EOY's...





its only i don't have the courage to leave this fucken world...





but only the courage to face dealt death, not voluntary death...





such a want wit fear makes of me...and fuck MOV





maths tuition helping minimally...cuz i cant seem to concentrate well after school hours...





school sucks...cant concentrate after the 1st few periods...





and everyday seems to be a heavy toll on everyone...as all are wearied by the school...





sometimes i envy jiawen going off to happy days in the states...life is so slack there...





sometimes we have to accept our fate that this is our life...though some fucked up life it is...





education is screwed...maybe at least here..and sometimes i regret allowing myself to be pushed around by my parents and somehow get into here...maybe i will be better off somewhere else...





only pros can take this...





noobs like me cannot...





its less than a month away...





and i have nothing ready to face it...





maybe i will just go take the o levels...





or just be a normal neighbourhood school teen...





not some top 10% academic shit here...and even so...being amongst the top will never satisfy them...they wont be satisfied till you become the top...





i believe many have this problem...a pity pity...

Damn you got only an A?
Go get more than this shit!
I wanna see a fucken star up there!

He toiled and sweated,
Worked and got screwed,
He got fucked up everytime,
Just to get that higher grade.

Get the hell outta here shit!

Only 90/100?

An A* is nothing but shit!

I want some 100s!

He got fucked again,

And clad himself in chains and pain,

He spent his blood and all his life,

Just for that higher grade.

Finally after dying again,

And coming back,

Drenched in blood and clad in chains,

Mangled body withering,

Twitching limbs without feel,

They finally didnt whip him.

All they did was scowl and not kill,
No torture chamber for this hour,
Blood dripping from his face, he looked up,
Only to see a snarling face.
He smiled back and had a glimmer of hope.
As they yelled, I like that full marks shit!
But that's only maths, don't think you're done!
The other 95 subjects have yet to come!


lol...just some random shit verse for this post...

this may be the last post before EOY...

or before i die...if the donut do kill us all...

anyways...

have fun breaking those mugs...fuck the school...

good night

or

good bye

Monday, July 28, 2008

84

Du**an High School
Academy of Murder
World Acclaimed Student Slaughter

We offer - Massacre Services (Mass Extermination of Students)
Despair Treatment (Make our students suffer more than others!)
Suicidal Extreme (When we make teenage suicide rates in Singapore go wayyy up!)
Heavy Blows Program (When we give them the good, then take it away from them!)
Shattering Mugs (When too much mugging breaks the mug, and your life spills out!)

And many many more!

Here are some of the comments of our satisfied sadists!

"They gave me TKB the best! But now...they...those BASTARDS! they took TKB AWAY FROM ME! THEY GAVE ME THE G! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!!?!??! THE G!!!!!! ARGH F**K!"

Anonymous by preference

"I'm feeling the stress of fu**ed up education in DHS."

Anonymous by preference

"DHS is one of the best schools ever! I'm having so much fun here!"

Anonymous by preference, but deceased due to mass assault upon saying such stupid things.

"School is a very fun place where we can enjoy learning at a gentle pace."

Edited, Chen Wei Heng, Irony Class 101, Language Arts, Year 2, 2008

"Aihs, you see those neighbourhood schools, so song sia!"

Chim Jia Jian


There's too much good comments for us! We can't possibly put it all here! So this is already a good reason to join us!

Send your child here to be screwed up and tortured! Let's all laugh at them while they miserably waste their life and energy dying!

DU**AN HIGH SCHOOL
ACADEMY OF MURDER
WORLD ACCLAIMED STUDENT SLAUGHTER

AWARDS:

MOST MASSIVE STUDENT BLOODSHED (2007,2008)
HIGHEST RATE OF SCHOOL SUCIDES (2003,2004,2006,2007)
MOST STUDENTS IN DEPRESSION (2005,2006,2007)
THE ROYAL MUG BREAKER AWARD(657 B.C., 2006,2007)
THE MICHAEL JACKSON PSYCHO STUDENTS AWARD (2005,2006)
THE QUALITY SLAUGHTER AWARD, SINGAPORE (2000 - 2007)
BEST STUDENT TORTURE ENTERTAINMENT AWARD (2003 - 2006)

THE CAMPUS JAIL OPEN, SINGAPORE - SILVER (2005)
GOLD (2006)
GOLD (2007)

SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DIE II - 2ND (2005)
1ST (2006, 2007)

SINGAPORE STUDENT SLAUGHER TOURNAMENT - 1ST (2005 - 2007)

SCHOOL UNIVERSE - 2ND (2006)
(MISS) 1ST (2007)

THE GUINESS 9 DEATHS TOUR - DU**AN HIGH SCHOOL - 1ST (2007)

CAMPUS KILLS SUPERSTAR - DHS - 1ST (2006, 2007)

THE FORMULA 99 , STUDENT KILLS RACE - DHS 1ST (2005, 2007)

THE INTERSCHOOL FRIENDLY STUDENT SUICIDE TOURNAMENT - 1ST (2006, 2007)

AND MANY MORE...

COME JOIN US!

DU**AN HIGH SCHOOL!

>>>!NOW RECRUITING!<<<

I would also like to wish all of you good luck in chionging your tests tmr...mind you don't crack your mugs! Good night.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

83

A.A.A.

Anti Academics Association

Let's Live Life! Screw Education!

NOW RECRUITING!!!!!!!


Sub-Clubs include

Anti-Tak Society

Burnin' Extraordinary Sums of Tiredness (B.E.S.T.)

Go Green! Save the Earth! No Exams! Campaign

Stop E-Learning! Save Our Eyesight and Electricity! Campaign (Anti E)

Operation H.Y.D.R.O.G.E.N.

TKBFC


We shall strive for our freedom. Our right to live!

Thursday, July 17, 2008

82

Evening all...as you can see...i have changed the skin...
I think this one is quite nice...i like the crossed guns and the 5 aces...and rmb you can change the colour of the skin using the 2 little small skulls at the top right...and the cards look light the black tiger and tally ho decks in the black skull mode...check it out, " quote, mr yeo meng han"...

Life is seriously quite screwed now...considering all the workload...and i agree fully to jiajian's point on dhs being very acadmic minded...but...which school is not academic minded? its only dhs expects a whole lot more from us cuz we are "gifted" students in a top government school...sometimes i regret coming here only to be snarled at by my parents for not being amongst the better in the school...say around the top 25%...thats what happened in pri sch...and i am proud to say i am even top 10% in some years...but this is different...i am sure many of you out there have the same problem...and i hope you can solve that problem by utilizing methods acordingly to your problems...

nothing much happened today...except i managed to hand in maths during recess...woots first time not chionging after sch...and i think science lab lessons are very nice...can talk to jj and gl michelle...lols...

maybe i'm going for fps tmr...i dunno...cuz i wanna sleep...and there's a lot of work to do...and my parents aint helping by scolding me at night when i'm trying to finish my work...seriously...even if i want to...i can't sleep at the usual 10 pm if they want me to finish my work...its impossible...i tend to get distracted easily but i'm trying hard to complete my work...i am tired too and i don't require their nagging to distract me further...

i have more bad news...i dun think i will be submitting my work for the budding writers cuz i dun have enough time to write more poems..my old poems are admittedly not as good as the ones i write now...(thats what i think)...i can't believe that i will actually get started on work on a friday...and i managed to get a start on the maths assignment just now...the questions are quite ok...

if i have to go for the fps...it will be at 7 am...so i'll have to wake up at around 5 plus...dammit...screw academics...does life ever matter at all?

"SCHOOL is a VERY FUN PLACE where can can acquire more knowledge."

quoted from YL, XW, JY and me...today in LA class...i feel the satisfaction from the expression of my irony and sarcasm...

Here's a shot lil rhyme verse i wrote out of boredom...it is the preview sneak peak of what-i-think-supposedly-yo-don't-have-to-agree-to-and-i-am-not-haolianing masterpiece...this is the preview of Quarantine...

The Clinking of the Chains

Marble floors,
Polished doors,
Painted walls.

My mansion,
My prison.

Prisoner of war in my own country,
Prisoner of restrictions in my own house,
Prisoner of chains and bars in my own prison,
Prisoner of pain and despair in my own mind.

I'll rustle the chains in a vain attempt,
To escape this nightmare prison camp.
The cell door closes, and locks.
So do my mind.

probably you can guess its topic already...

Its getting late...for me that is...not for you...so i'll say goodnight here...

Saturday, July 12, 2008

81

hey all...i will be posting less and less as time progresses...as it has come again...

Quarantine is a part of every year...it usually occurs halfway through term 3 or at the start of term 4...the best "quarantine" was in p1, when i was banned from tv 1 week before exams...and the worst so far was p6...when i was banned the moment june hols ended...all the way until the psle was over...

this year...it has started now...with the first restrictions of no gaming...all the games in my com are deleted forcibly and I was forced to pain myself by clicking the uninstall button...

quarantine is pain...it involves the slow shutdown of all my priveledges one by one...usually it comes out like this...according to chronological order

1st rule - No Xbox, PSP, Gameboy...those major gaming equipment are only available during holidays...with the exception of the september holidays...

2nd rule - No gaming on weekdays..weekends only...this is normally a routine which happens every day of the school term...

3rd rule - reduction of gaming time

4th rule - deletion of games...usually occurs at the start of every quarantine period...

5th rule - more workload, occurs through entire quarantine

6th rule - no com...usually occurs a week or two before the exams...

7th rule - no tv...occurs a week before exams

8th rule - (plausible) no more memory card with all my music during the week of exam

9th rule - (plausible) i will be taken home after sch immediately...a week before or during exams...

10th rule - extreme isolation - during the week of exam...nothing but study...

besides the cycle above...theres a big chance that my laptop will be shifted to the living room table so they can ensure i'm doing right stuff and not slacking...

I am not going to complain about this...this is just an explanation to why i will not be posting much anymore and my much induced emo-ness during this period...but however..the worst has not come yet...so i have a couple of weeks of slight fun...

I believe under these circumstances...i can do well...yes and i shall...its my chance to get outta this once and for all..this is merely part of the price to pay...

I am prepared. I am ready. I can survive this.

and just for fun...i will be listing the duration of my quarantine from pri 1 to now...

Pri 1 - 1 week
Pri 2 - 1 week
Pri 3 - 2 weeks
Pri 4 - 4 weeks
Pri 5 - 4 weeks
Pri 6 - 3+ months
Sec 1 - 4 weeks
Sec 2 - 3 months

I hope you all are enjoying your last moments of fun before your quarantine. Even though some of your's may come later or some may not even have quarantine at all, I wish you all the best in surviving your's if you have and able to get good grades for them to see if you are ready to sacrifice your happy times for good grades. To all who are like me: Trust yourself that you are gonna live through it. Yes you can. Once you work hard for them and its all over, you will be happier. And I would also like to wish those who don't have quarantine good luck. Yes, good luck in screwing yourself. Dammit.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

80

hey all...now watching wimbledon finals...rafael nadal seems to be owning roger federer...and by the way...check out the time...have funs ~ =D

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

79

see the time...=D i'm living the life...wo0ts ~

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

78

this will be a short post...had idmi meeting in the morning...was late by 2 hours...cuz unfortunately some ppl do not understand the sad meaning of my life and decided to notify me of the meeting at 10.30 pm...leading to a disastrous chain of events involving a couple of aching legs, minutes of scolding endurance and much chionging...

i shall take this chance to tell ppl who do not know...I AM FORCED TO SLEEP AT 10 PM...UNLESS ITS A DAY WHICH THEY HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO LET ME STAY TO DO WORK, BUT NEVERTHELESS, MY PHONE WILL BE TAKEN AWAY FOR THE NIGHT TO PREVENT MESSAGING MY FRIENDS WHEN I AM SUPPOSED TO BE ASLEEP...AND THE PHONE WILL ONLY BE RELEASED TO ME WHEN I RISE IN THE MORNING.THEREFORE, I AM VERY SORRY TO ALL MY GROUP MEMBERS FOR TURNING UP LATE ALL BECAUSE OHH..THIS BASTARD SLEEPS SO EARLY...WOO...THIS ASSHOLE IS A MAMA'S BOY...(NO OFFENCE AND NOT DIRECTED TO ANYONE), SO PLEASE, I BEG ALL OF YOU TO UNDERSTAND THAT THE SAD MISERABLE BASTARD LIKE ME HAS TO SLEEP BY 10, EVEN THOUGH INSOMNIA TAKES OVER AND I CAN DO NOTHING BUT STARE AT THE CEILING...MY PHONE IS NOT WITH ME! SO I WOULD LIKE ALL OUT THERE WHO IS KIND ENOUGH TO TELL ME IMPORTANT THINGS BETWEEN 6AM AND 10PM...I HAVE NO WAY TO TALK MY MOTHER OVER THIS...NO WAY...I HAVE ALREADY ARGUED WITH MY MOM OVER THIS ISSUE MANY TIMES AND THE MOST RECENT DEBATE WAS A FEW MINUTES AGO...I WOULD LIKE TO REQUEST ELAINE TO HURRY UP WITH THE POWERPOINT SO I CAN AVOID A PAINFUL SCOLDING LATER IN THE NIGHT. THANK YOU VERY VERY MUCH.

THANK YOU ALL.

ALSO SORRY TO ALL FOR ANY INCONVENIENCE...BUT MY LIFE IS NOT AS FREE AS YOURS...SO MIND YOU BE CONSIDERATE TO UNFORTUNATE PPL LIKE ME.

THANK YOU ALL AGAIN.

ah lets continue...hmm...gave out surveys from 11plus to 1plus...and me and toon finished most fast...so slacked at plaza sing...oh wait...here comes the caps again...

ANOTHER REQUEST TO ALL, PLEASE DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE I'M SOME SORT OF RETARD WHEN I GET THE CHANCE TO GO TO AN OUTING IN THESE TROUBLED TIMES. CUZ ITS REALLY IMPOSSIBLE AND IF I MANAGE TO GET OUT EVEN FOR A FEW MINUTES I WILL BE OVERJOYED TO THE EXTEND I MAY SEEM LIKE AN ESCAPED MENTAL PATIENT. CUZ GOING OUT IS AN AMAZING FEAT WHICH COMES TO ME ONLY VERY SELDOMLY...GOING OUT MAY MEAN NOTHING TO YOU BUT IT MEANS EVERYTHING TO ME...IT PROVES THAT I AM AT LEAST A HUMAN AND CAN LIVE LIFE!

hmm i guess thats about it for the plaza sing...slacked around and looked in some game stores...ooh wait...

ALRIGHT...THIS MAY BE GETTING BORING BUT I AM STILL EMPHASISING POINTS...MIND YOU DO NOT LAUGH AT ME IF I DO NOT DARE TO STEP INTO COMICS CONNECTION OR GAMING WORLD SOMETIMES IF SOMETHING BAD JUST HAPPENED RECENTLY... I HAVE THIS UNFORTUNATE EVENT OF MY MOTHER HAPPENING TO BE IN TM AND I WAS SNEAKING OUTTA SCHOOL TO LOOK INTO GAMING WORLD...THE SAME THING HAPPENED AT THE SHOPPING CENTER NEAR MY HOUSE WHEN I DECIDED TO LOOK INTO COMICS CONNECTION WHEN I WAS PASSING... IT WAS PAINFUL..REAL PAINFUL WHEN MY MOTHER SAW ME IN THE SHOPS...EVEN WHEN I AM GOING OUT WITH THEM...ONCE I GOT A PUBLIC SCOLDING WHEN I WAS LOOKING IN GAMING WORLD WHEN I WAS WAITING FOR MY MOTHER TO COME BACK FROM THE TOILET..MY DAD SCOLDED ME AND PULLED ME AWAY FROM THE STORE AND MY MOTHER PROCEEDED TO ADD INSULT TO INJURY...IN PUBLIC! SO THANK YOU ALL FOR UNDERSTANDING WHY I DON'T GO INTO COMICS CONNECTION SOMETIMES...

alright...hmm...thats about it really... and went to kfc for lunch...oh another one!

EH ALL...THIS IS GETTING FUNNY...BUT PLEASE DON'T MIND IF I DO NOT COME WITH YOU PPL TO THOSE JONATHAN RESTAURANTS OR THOSE F-ING RICH AND EXPENSIVE PLACES TO EAT CUZ I'VE GOT OBLIGATIONS...LOL...

ok after that go training...then come home wait for ah cai and chiong script now...good night and good luck to all...

Monday, June 30, 2008

77

these inspirations keep coming...quick...before i forget...

Two Perspectives

The Bridge Between Us

Blood-Stained Secrets

Alien

The Poem Poem (The Song Song)

No Happy Endings (Ain't A Fairytale)


thats about it i guess...but i still need time to carve out the poems leh...sian la...and i doubt they can earn me much money cuz there are many ppl much more pro out there also reaching out for the 15% of profits...

just a short recap of what happened this for the past week...electives were fun...baking is nice...fire extinguisher course is kinda sian but ok...and cartooning rocks...

idmi is a fu**ed up thing...so i hope it will be over soon...and maybe bringing laptop on wed with jj...download away..tmr to sch...so good...but got training...so sian...i also updated the songs in my phone...including some very nice ones like Everything by michael buble and holiday by green day..other nice ones like lollipop by lil wayne and sunshine by twista ft anthony hamilton are also added in...but my favourite of all the additions is barbie girl by aqua..it reminds me of the popular tunes i heard when i was younger...and the song is very techno and catchy...yes and i like nigahiga videos...very funny...but not addicted to them till the extent of sim to hibari...oh yes and sim has a blog...i will link when i have more time...times up for now...good night

Saturday, June 28, 2008

76


I'm just finding a place to write my inspirations down...and partly to revive this blog a bit...

pretty much though...quick..before i forget..

What Can I Say? - Excuses to explain problems

I Won't Live, I Won't Die - Irony...living IS dying

Working for Coffee - Working for more work

Quarantine - title suggests

Worse than the Worst - even the worst is better than me

Guardian of the Windows and the Doors - thats me

Unintelligible - i don't understand what you say

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

Glance - Why won't you look at me?

Memories of the Future

thats about it...suggestions welcome...its for my money though...heh...i shall try to post some pics of the states soon enough...and jiajian...take care to use your words properly..
i will offer services...tips only...

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

75

wassup y'all...i screwed my life up as usual...but there's one good thing...i have got it...how to unscrew my life...but its gonna be painful...



like jiajian suggested...working hard for all the stuff...its the simplest solution and it had always been right in front of my eyes...but i refused to use the plan and act as it is very tedious and painful...but now there's no more choice as all the other plans failed to work at all...so...expect to see a new me next semester...ima get my freedom this year...I'M GOING TO GET IT!

The price will be paid...there shall be no more outings before the EOY (unless permitted) and i shall restrict my com playing to minimal and study to maximal...

that would mean something like quarantine...

ok let's blog abt today...

- Mr Yeo is a funny man...who plays patapon (whatever that is) on his PSP...and that reminds me that i will be getting my beloved psp and xbox back 2 days later...

May they be covered in dust since the lonely isolation from March...but their edges shall melt once more and buttons and thumbsticks pounded with the return of the June Holidays.

- Meng Han teaches fairly well...and i somehow manage to pay more attention to him...and he bears an uncanny resemblance to jiajian ..somehow...

alrite enuff abt mr yeo...now for replies to tags...

To JJ : Yeah i got your point...thanks for the tip

To XW : Your singing is fine la...just don't too much can le...and i AM going to study hard...

To Dionne : Yo hi camp most fun wif u guys ~ thanks for coming =D..and i will link ~

To SW : lols...i young ma...thanks anyways...and lagging is nothing wrong...i do that all the time =D

To Trisha : hihi ~ long time no see le..thanks for dropping by =D

To Nicholette : hi...camp most fun...yeah i will study hard...sure de...and anyways the play is over la...at least we tried ~ thanks for coming here =D

To Ben : Screw your balls ~ they won't come this blog de...and added msn le..


2 days to hols and i am going to announce my big news...for ONCE i am proud to say that i am comparable to you guys ~~....NOW I SHALL ANNOUNCE!

I AM GOING TO US TO WATCH NBA FINALS!

that's definitely something to cheer me up...dad's got free tickets...and free tickets for evrything!..and VIP passes and stuff...

I've waited so long for the day to be better than the rest, and I am proud to say that the day has come at last.

Apologies for the possible offense and sorry if i had hao lian-ed or suanned you in any way...sorries ~

I'm going off on the 29th...i think...and back on the 8th or 9th...ima gonna have some fun there...something which i had not experienced for ages...and this is the FIRST time i'm going to USA....i know its nothing to some of you but i am just happy ~

maybe i can go find jiawen there...surprises expected...

naturally something as happy as this wont happen but since there are free tics why waste them? haha...

rest assured i will bring back souveniers for all... ~

Homework report ~ LA reflections done, left 1 artefact chionging tmr morning...
Wishlist for this week ~ psp game download sites, and where to modify my psp and music to last me for the hols...

ok now for the EMO side...

i'm seriously gonna work hard like shit during 2nd semester...and not get distracted...sorry...

too bad the budding writers thing is not counted...otherwise maybe i still have a little bit more chance...but at least i'm getting paid for that...(if i'm pro enough that is...) :)

i'm going to put some seriously emo poetry here so if you dislike emo please do not continue...if you want to explore the realms of sophisticated emo you are welcome here...

Love is the Currency

My life's going down,
Way down,
Till the extent I can live a day without a frown.
I have lost the coloured happiness crown,
And my life's going down,
All the way down.

I'd sit by the roadside, drenched in sweat,
Running through thoughts within my worn-out brain,
Down by the dump I had sat,
Crying out for help in vain.

So this is all life ever asked from me,
Good grades to put a smile on their face,
Bad grades to twitch their fingers holding knives,
And trigger that tranquility to craze.

So is this what we are living for?
If you're smart, you'll fly,
If you're not, you'll be dripping blood on the floor,
Get tortured, tormented and die...

There ain't no way to change this world,
There ain't no way a bastard like me,
can shine like a box full of gold,
No, not in mine nor yours wildest dreams,
No, that's stupid not bold.

To live, we must all pay the price,
Of a dollar just to get back a cent,
Drinking and smoking are no longer a vice,
If it straightens your happiness's bent.

I'm sorry, girl, I'm moving on,
No, not in that way.
I'm moving on to save myself,
So take care of yourself, okay?

All I'd pack in my tattered mind,
Are memories of the faded past,
But look into me, then you'll find,
Those memories are not meant to last.

I'm sorry, girl, I'm saving myself,
I'll have to give you up and leave you,
Remember this, if I'm not back in twelve,
Go on without me, do what you do.

I'm sorry, girl, I'm forced to do this,
I've gotta live,
Its just one last hug and one last kiss,
And it's time for me to leave.

I'll toss you to the back of my mind,
To pursue the paths that they have laid,
Unless I lose the path and die,
I will come back for you, I've said.

I will pay the price to live,
But I promise you faithfully,
I had never wanted it this way,
But I have no choice or say,
So just take care of yourself okay?

Go find some better life with him,
For in his life, love is not the currency,
Don't turn back to me, no don't turn,
For in my life, it is.


"For many people, sacrifices have to be made to achieve your goal."
"For some people, barely any sacrifices have to be made and they can achieve any goal."

"For me, love is the sacrifice which I made to achieve THEIR goal."

Saturday, May 17, 2008

74

Hey all...back frm level camp...quite fun la...actually very fun...compared to what i thought before...considering i even considered ponning the camp...now let's talk abt what happened on that island with that bloody steep hill which we had to climb everyday...

Day 1

Went to sch with my gigantic bag...and waited for hell long until we got onto the bus which the bloody old driver drove so damn slowly...and slept on the bus...was in grp 3 with instructor joel...he has nice hair and nice dance moves and nice looks...wo0ts...got ben balls and yun en i know de...so not bad and got toon in my mirror group 4...so very fun...go there and use insect repellant spray like shit after climbing that fucking slope...lol...and lugging my damn heavy bag...

amazing race afterwards...chiong arnd like siao...lucky nvr tio the caterpillar...wo0ts...yeah and i in major A...

dinner was nice...so was lunch...didnt had to beg for alota food for day 1...

and i think that showering is futile in that place...as we had night activities after we shower...and chionging outta those curtainless cubicles after rinsing ourselves barely have any uses at all...lol...oh yes and rason has a nice mango smellin' soap...
got the cubicle right in front of da door today...

kidnap!...our hostage was yu peng and he slept through the thing...lol...so we slacked a bit and "best" chief veron tricked us into thinking we got the key and ended up second last...

lights out at 11...but actually slept at 12 i think...as i couldnt sleep and kept waking up at night as it was so fucking HOT!

Day 2

woke at 6...played a bit of poker with sim, toon and j-ster...then chiong to breakfast...
the basketball court is damn sandy...just place your hand on the court and it will come back with a handful of sand...
BUDHHA CLAPS! they are the best sia...i think 500 is barely enough that day to satisfy our needs...as its the best activity ever!

was nearly ready was gladiator when it started raining and through the whole day...so ended up locked in the cage and getting fucked up to boredom with those activities...

practised our screwed up skit for a while...and ended up screweing it up even more...so we are screwed...

got the one at the far right at 15 today...still visible from the door but not as much as shi ning's favourite...

dinner was nice...had some donations and was duty group...played with ben and the trolley up the slope and the ice we were pushing up was leaking through a hole in the bag - -"...

had candle fight afterwards...defending only 1 pair of ppl...lol...like no one dared to come liddat...and brandon owns...

FLY INFESTATION! the toilets were pawned...

light's out at 10.30...so could not sleep...and yong ming crapped like shit until about 11 plus...pissing a couple off and entertaining nearly the whole dormitory...

Day 3

finally had water rafting...which was extremely fun...during which jalan boy emo-ed for more than an hour...aihs he a bit weird weird de la...siao de...so nvms~...

gladiator...probably the most nice activity...and JUSTINN TOON IS A FUCKING ACCURATE BASTARD...who took down 4 or 5 kings through all the rounds...i got 2 kings...and got hit once~

I'd never thought i would ask a girl for protection...but all are doing it now...LOLS.

captain's ball was very fun...especially the last round...with the poor lil' chicken being torn apart by 80 hands...and flung around in the air and landing to be covered in bits of grass...

got the head and the neck...but the neck broke into several pieces when i was trying to throw it...lol...and the best part was brandon...with the flying and spining chicken leg...on a graceful flight from one end of the field to the other...
had some last minute dry runs for the skit...and prepared ourselves for the screwing...

screwing time!...we screwed...and my balls hurt after the pants pullin'...

wen xin's dance most imba...and jj's beatbox is nice ~others very nice also...

then chief veron made me sleep with all that emo talk arnd midnite..light's out at 12.45...and nearly overslept that mornin'

Day 4

woke at 6.30...and cleaned out dorm 14...and there's still a piece of underwear in dorm 15 HAHA!

finally go liaos...cya st. john's island...

oh yes and the boat ride was like a roller coaster ride when it arrived at sg...

went to buy heaven at 7 eleven...never had ice lemon tea and sprite tasted so good...after 3 days of plain water and soya bean...
went home with veron and sim...

that's about it...post more when i have time...

Sunday, May 11, 2008

73

Hey all...just realized got 2.4 for GPA this semester...wo0ts...i'm screwed like mother...i didnt realize my entire life can be compromized in just a couple of hours of that fucking parent teacher conference...

You may agree that my life is already so screwed in the first place...but now its screwer...aihs...there's no more chance...maybe that damn fortune teller was right...according to my grandmother..if i don't work like fucking **** hard this year...i will be screwed...and i admit i didnt work hard at all this semester...so its time to pay the price...

So is this the only thing everyone cares about now? grades? when does living life and being yourself mean anything all all as long as grades and certificates and scholarships exist? i know its unrealistic...or even spastic...to think about changing this fucked up world now...so let's just hope that it can end early so we won't suffer...

You see all those inspirational posters and quotes and shit...its about living life to the fullest and enjoying it...all those shit...does that matter in this world now? all which matters in this world now is working hard like fuck and getting all those grades and certificates and scholarships...and while those streamers erupt around you...its only a matter of time before you leave this world and not enjoy fame, fortune and power anymore...

There's this one shit which my father said which is seriously fucked up...he says "This world is very fair." its either he's a moron or he's spastic or he's too easily satisfied...or he's really very admirable to look on the bright side of this black world...

Also...it appears my parents like saying shit..."You are working hard for good grades for yourself!"...yeah right...if i want to help myself i won't be torturing myself like that...
i welcome the end with open arms...and i wish i can see the end of this fucking world in my lifetime...so i can run to the frontline, open my arms and embrace the journey to a happier world...

I regret coming to dunman high now...my parents fought hard for my appeal to get inside here...but what do i come here for? for my parents to haolian in front of their colleagues? i could have stayed in chung cheng and be happy with above average grades...but not a lousy struggler in dunman high surrounded by geniuses...

i hope that i will just drown and die during the level camp...or just trip on a rock and fall into the sea off st. john's island...because i have a solution for this...a very simple one...

shall i become an outcast? a bastard who had failed in everything...his grades...his life...his friends?...

I believe there's no possibility for me to continue playing basketball anymore...and my com allowance time may be decreased to even an hour per week...or worse...i get the quarantine...maybe even tv wont be available for long...and don't even mention outings...

Wo0ts...i just ruined my life...(ok maybe its this year and not my whole life)...

Shall i chain my arms and legs up to save myself? or should i chain my neck to save myself?

either way...i'm screwed...

...

Let's look on the not so dark side of things...something i've learnt from happy happy sw...

hmm...

let's see what "happy" stuff i have to talk about...

ok there's only one thing...

There's this budding writers thing which is something like CAP...about writing LA stuff and submitting them...but you don't get any $$ from CAP...but from this...you will actually get to have your works published and you will get 15% of profits! so i'm definitely in...and mind you don't tell my parents anything about that cuz i wanna keep the money if by luck and chance my works get selected...jia jian will be with me for the illustrations and some ideas for poems...i know it will be a long way until the submission but i am excited about the chance to earn and keep my own money...haha..and not be possessed by my parents...yeah and who want come join me also can...we'll split evenly the $$...IF we get it la...this is the real world...the big game...

yes ...and congratulations ant for having the permission to learn guitar...and congratulations on your happy outing =D...my time will come soon...and soon enough i can join you'all...wo0ts...but it's gonna take a lot of fucking hard work to get there...so you'll hafta wait...

camp's coming in the next 2 days..and i got ben balls, yun en, and pajama boy...but i don't know the rest of the ppl...aihs...let's see what's gonna happen...

Thursday, May 8, 2008

72

Evening. I have a request to ask you all to go to the school forum and find my thread in general suggestions/opinions and comment about the problems in GPA...thanks and goodnight

Sunday, May 4, 2008

71

hi wassup...ystd go EDS Night very nice...considering its my 1st outing of the year...biggest credits goes to xw for selling me the ticket...thanks a lot...and to the school...for making my parents believe i have to go for at least one outing...thanks chern wei! (or issit some1 else i dunno)...

i know that wenxin is violent...and exceptionally so in the act about the fire thing...and the dancers are pro and that EDS teacher who is very tall is very nice at making ppl laugh with his funny parody about singaporeans and women.

justinn has a vid of 2 of the performances...and i must say again that the dancers are pro...after watching them again...

and for some reason i feel sorry for their lead actor...as he kept getting hit painfully in the encore act.

and it was a full house that night...hell lotta ppl and some ppl , like ant, wear until very nice...come here suan ppl like me...

there's this pact i made with jj...after the show..."Let's do this again some other time."...so rest assured i will ensure i try to attend as many of your happy outings as possible in the future..even if it means defying "them"...

of course...as usual...i tio scolding after the concert for "walking out slowly"...and "not answering calls and messages"...and other damned stuff which you wil never have to worry about if you go on an outing...so thats one price to pay aside from the $10 for the ticket...

yes and another thing..."low" by flo-rida ft. t-pain is very popular amongst the students...i have noticed...as enthusiastic response was seen when the starting beats of the dance song played...

i hope that outings and concerts like this can happen again and hopefully i can attend them just like any one of you out there...

Cass,Jialing,Rachel,Wee Qin,Wenxin and all the other EDS peeps and that tall man :) = imba

Poetry

Happy Bugis-ing
Inspired by Justinn Toon Fu Jin

A word,
A sentence,
All you need to say,
A concert,
An outing,
You are going out today.

I'd pretend to know nothing,
As you made your slow decisions,
Not even letting them know a word,
You escape out of your prisons.

I'd look and smile, knowing that it is just usual.
I won't turn and sulk, but accept that it is real.
I'l follow suit, thinking that I'm like you,
Or you're like me.
But even though we walk the same road,
We are as different as anything can be.

Its just 15 and a nine,
And to me its just fine,
I thought that you would continue,
But alone I will walk this avenue.

Without warning, crowds of you will head out.
While I turn from the darkness outside the window.
I'd look, and laugh, and say goodbye,
Add a word of happy bugis-ing,
And turn to my death with a sigh.

thanks justinn toon for the inspiration...

sometimes i get the feeling that you do not bother reading any of my poetry..and i feel no point of posting more if no one would read them...but still i trust that even the meanest of ppl will have the little patience to read a few lines as they have money and time.

Here's one final piece of poetry today...inspired by EDS Night...or rather my way of attending it...

Last To Arrive, First To Leave

An anxious glance at my $2 watch,
My heart skipped beats, as the MRT rattles.
Through the crowds of people I dodge,
I am trying to win time's battles.

Don't worry, start without me,
I would say,
Don't say sorry, just go on,
Make your day.

A sprint to the escalator I would make,
Hoping I won't make the same mistake,
Of arriving late,
Simply following my fate,
Or crashing my own first date.

Its not my fault,
Till the bars of my cage become unlocked.
Guards gone, now my enemy is the clock,
I'd race against you, tick-tock, tick-tock.

I'd skid to a halt in front of your annoyed eyes,
And my blazing heat turns to ice.
A cold word of let's go,
I'd pant as i walk to and fro.

I'd enjoy it as much as you,
Because they won't make me a fool,
I will seize this chance to make the best,
And be happy for once like the rest.

But the nightmare reccurs after its over,
As missed calls and messages wreck my phone,
Once you hear me talking in that usual tone,
You'd know my time's up, game over.

I'd hastily say goodbye, and have fun,
As i turn away from the laughter and mirth.
Back to my prison i would run,
And hope quickly for the next rebirth.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

new skin =D ace of spades

hey all as you can see i got a new skin...please leave comments on it in the tag and thanks for coming once again...
ok stupid post but i aint got no more time...so have fun and good night.

P.S. - The words at the left side of the blog is "I don't care if my life is a jack of diamonds or an ace of spades, because i play them equally well." the first part is missing as the navbar thing cut into it...so sry abt that...and i find the phrase very meaningful...haha so i chose this skin.

Monday, April 14, 2008

check out the time

check out the time...its soo cool ~

Monday, April 7, 2008

the guy by the side

Hey its been long since i posted...but as usual with me...my life ain't so interesting and fun filled with happy things to talk about like yours...but i sure got things to say...all those stupid emo and sad shit...
we are learning about blogging in those computing lessons...lol...kinda weird to teach us things like that...when i understand not all have the time and freedom to make a interesting and alive blog...so i appreciate my opportunity...
we slacked off chinese skit like siao
Reason #1 - No props
Reason #2 - No justinn ( i told him to shoo when he peeked through the back door in chinese lesson with kian boon)
Reason #3 - Jiajian sore throat

lol...

and shing chun was exceptionally pissed with ww for slacking off...so pissed that he came to gay with zhi en during free time

yeah its kinda very emo in my lil' corner at the back of the class...which unfortunately cikgu noorizan like to pick on...and an old tradition of anne ang's (as featured in Maxim and Playboy)...
but one good thing is listening to music without the teacher knowing...

maths lessons = slacking and sianness

pe = aching muscles by bernard

chinese = bedtime stories

geog = plain copying and working with the same people over and over again

la = fun slacking literary circle ( i ain't got the book yet)

music = super fun and trying to avoid those contaminated seats...

history = waste of foolscape

malay = getting picked on again and again

aihs i won't elaborate...

here's another thing...

i realised i had not even gone to one outing this year so far...i hope that is a yet and not for sure...aihs...this may be due to the big mistake i made during that incident or because of some other unknown scheme which is steadily drawing me further and further away from my friends i guess...

oh yes and i just realised i am not a weirdo in writing all those poems and stories and stuff since the computing instructor also had a friend who wrote similar stuff...so yay! i am not a weirdo ~ wo0ts...even though you may still think i am...the one who never hangs out with the "gang"...


The Guy By The Side

"Hey, what's he doing emo-ing down there, not having fun with us?"
"Well, he's a weirdo, everyone knows that, the weenie who complains about his mother all the time."
"Yes! He's such a bastard compared to the class."
"Yeah. I think being this kind of bastard should be a crime."

I operate the spotlights,
Twiddle the equaliser,
The striped referee of your fights,
The solo, emo-ing loner.

I look,
Not shout like you.
Surveying silently, you may think I'm a fool,
Not standing in the centre stage,
But being locked up in a cage,
Like a pawn being crushed by a rook.

I don't seem to be told the things,
Which makes up the foundations of your talks.
I don't seem to know the things,
Which you discuss as you walk.

I lay my boots on the table,
In some distant corner of the club,
With just a bottle of ale and a can of beer,
I watch the action and listen to the hubbub.

I light a cigarette with an invisible flame,
Blowing smoke rings which melt into the air,
Staying in darkness instead of fame,
Choosing silence instead of flair.

I lounge in my chair,
Waiting for you to stop,
And come out of your celebrity lair,
Which I was so intent to rob.

I drum my fingers on the table,
Shake a leg, mumble a minor tune,
Waiting, just waiting for you to stop your petty squabble,
And just notice the solitary audience soon.

I stare darkly at your light,
Dimming over the inferior, not giving a fight,
Nor in sight,
Not right.
I clad in sombre black while you dressed in dazzling white.

I smile at you taking all the glory,
Attention,
Fun.
And I laugh silently,
In your shadow of your reputation,
And those "amazing" things you've done.

So what draws all that fame?
Fortune,
Power?
Is it being the opposite of lame?
Being cool?
SPENDING power?

All that was just a show,
A poorly acted yet well disguised show,
Dressed in expensive wrappings of silver and gold,
Worth more than all i had ever sold.

So I still smile and laugh,
At those fools thinking you are great,
I see through the interval, that curtain call,
That you are nothing to what is said,
Of you,
But merely a broken rule?

I'm by the side, not noticed, no,
Not mentioned, no,
Always shooed away from the centre stage,
But no, I don't feel no rage,
But savage pleasure that I know,
You are just nothing within, but many out,
And all that stuff is just an act,
Water in a wine bottle.

I'm the bastard by the side,
Operating your spotlights,
Backstage crew, clad in black,
Standing way behind your back.

A flick of a switch and spotlights' off,
And all that you pretended to be is gone.

"Hey what the hell is this weirdo bastard writing?"
"I don't know, but it sure is scary."
"Ah who cares about him anyway? He's nothing more than a dust mite."
"Yeah, he's just a loner by the side."


...

...

K back to reality...think what you will of the poem, and say what you want, but only if you truly understand me and my fucked up life then you will ge the through meaning of it...

I suddenly got many inspirations, and i'm gonna put another one right here...


I Don't Fulfill Requirements

"I'm sorry but you don't fulfill our requirements."
"Oh fine, its due to my imprisonment."

I hate this thing,
I've got one step in but the other step out,
And i don't know what's it about.
Am i in? Or am i out?
Just tell me damn it,
Before i shout.

I go out 4 to 5 times a year,
Does that fulfill requirements?
I get $25 a week, nothing else,
Does that fulfill requirements?
I have to ask my guards everytime i leave my cell,
Does that fulfill requirements?
No i'm sorry, but you do not fufill requirements.

Oh money is only part of it,
Don't get me started on the talking,
The more i talk, the better i get,
At just tearing down your building.

I ain't got no experience,
I ain't got no sence of direction,
Cause' my cell has 7 locks,
But the keys are swallowed with intention.

I can't talk about your movies,
Does that fulfill requirements?
I can't discuss the latest trends in the streets,
Does that fulfill requirements?
I can't buy the latest coolest stuff in meets,
Does that fulfill requirements?
No, i'm sorry, but you do not fulfill requirements.

I can't fill out my application form,
As questions asked are barely answerable,
With shit like "Do you watch movies with your friends at least 20 times a year?"
"Do you just go out without the parents killing you fear?"

With all that shit,
And all that crazy things.
All i can only do is express my concern, that,
I don't fulfill requirements.


Same thing as before...

Sometimes i feel if only i could have someone with a good voice and good music talent...we can turn just lines of rhymy words into music...lol...its a stupid kind of dream and idea but many of you ppl are dreaming out there like this...so for once i am comparable to your prowess...

I can judge everything from the way everyone is treating me now...i'm not saying anything or anyone is wrong or whatever...i am ready and prepared to solve such problems...unlike some of you weaklings out there...

Oh yes and me and xw share the same thoughts of that we will witness a big catsaprophe in our lifetime...maybe soon...or later...but i just know we are gonna see something big happen in our lifetime...something big...

And also...i just found some new songs which are quite enjoyable to listen to...

New Favourites

Four Minutes by Madonna ft. Justin Timberlake
When I'm Gone by 3 Doors Down
When I'm Gone by Enimem
When I'm Gone by Simple Plan
Be With You by Enrique Iglesias
Cherry Cola by Savage Garden
Crash and Burn by Savage Garden
Love Gravy by Chef
1973 by James Blunt
NBA by Allen Iverson, Method Man, DMX


i am also collecting some reccomendations...so send me all your nice songs...i got about 180 mb to spare...343 songs and still counting ~

Thursday, March 27, 2008

grand money massacre

due to lack of time today...i shall not post any extracts from my writings..but about and interesting event which happened today...

Grand $$$ Massacre
2Hydrus
Dunman High School, Mount Sinai
27/03/2008
$300+ lost
0815 - 0915

Today, about half of all the girls' money in our class got stolen, and the pain of it is magnified sevenfold due to many factors...

1 - Bastard who took more than $300 from the packed wallets of the gals of hydrus

2 - Packed wallets which strongly tempted a possibly stranger while the entire class is out to music class...

3 - Free wallets filled with loads of money lying on tables and under them and in bags which of all places are easiest to steal...enough to tempt anyone...

4 - Talk by Mr Ng (my shining stars) which probably infuriated many but i shall not express my views on that matter as things may turn out badly for me if i speak my mind...

5 - Inability to get the culprit...(too bad it was not me...) and he has now succedded in his crime...as its schools over and the moneys with him...and off he goes to his house and its over...no one could ever find out...


I admire that culprit a lot...as he/she has a lot of nerve to try that in dunman high school (dungman high according to xiaowen)...and its amazing how he could easily get away with more than $300 in less than an hour...maybe even in minutes...also...he/she was excellent and left no clues for us to find out anything...which stumps even me (descendant of sherlock holmes and my assistant, anthony wattson)...

But what i don't admire so much is him...a bastard who makes off with most of the money of our class's gals...(even though it may not mean much to some...)...so justinn and me have decided if we find that bastard...we will knock the stuffing outta him...like we did to jiawen and weng wa today...but even so...i still felt a little tinge of regret that i did not have his courage and could easily make off with more than $300...lying and concealing had never been easier...so it appears the culprit have won...an easy stuff down his/her undergarments and its settled...

Damn...why couldn't it have been me...

on the other hand...it appears that our ppl have a lot of money and a lot of tolerance too...which gave that culprit such an easy job...and much harvest...so...like i said...if i were to express my views...things will turn out badly for me...and ppl will hate me for thinking that...but its due to my father's education...forced education which enforced that value into me and also my life and background...appreciating every grain of rice...but maybe its not for you...so i shall shut up...

What else i admired today was the coolness of the DM Teo Chor Howe, Richard Hia Joo Tiah, and a couple of other dudes...who turned over our bags, willing to check the dangerous contents of our shoes...and bang open our locks...with amazing awe, coolness and a detective CSI aura...and one of em' even had a walkie talkie!! damn thats cool...

Let's conclude this...its mainly the culprit's problem but you ppl hold some responsibility too...and its weird how some feel so little at so much losses...and i understand the pain of some who cried their hearts out at such a heavy loss...i understand...and i'm sorry for your catastrophe...

All the best to the gang of teacher who i finally found so cool and intimidating (even though mr teo was so much shorter than me and was unable to open the electric box thing and had to ask me for help)...to finding the culprit...

And all the best to those trying to take some backup compensation from your parents...

But one more thing...all the best to the bloody culprit...in surviving if justinn and i ever found you...

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

post 1

Evening...they are out! its excellent...some china merchants had come over for investments so they are engrossed in making some commision outta it...so they are out !! yeah !

like i mentioned...i will be putting the contents of my so called book, on this blog every few days or so...and i will release it bit by bit...a word/phrase a day, a theory a day, and a solution to a problem a day...and probably a quote a day too...

so first on...

The Chainball's Dictionary, extract

"Its been a long while since I went to an outing."
Classification : Dialouge
Comparison : Happy - Sadist

Happy Meaning : Since happy people go out so very often, their "long while" may mean just a week.

Sadist Meaning : Since sadist people hardly ever got to go out, and are simply not allowed so, they tend to oftenly say it, but the "long while" within it may most probably mean at least half a year or so.


Theories of the Caged , extract
Theory : Even though a sad person did not win the lottery, his parents did, but he celebrated just like them.
Why? : Traditionally, a sad person's characteristics do not show parents ever sharing their profits with their children, but it happens, but extremely rarely. But winning the lottery is supposed to make people happy, and if the parents' moods are to his favour, his life will take a definite upturn and its always a good thing to have a chance to enjoy yourself, even for sad people as they do not have much chances at all.

Example : "Today, I'm eating teriyaki chicken don because my parents won the lottery!"


Guide to Surviving the Extremes, introduction

When solving your sadist problems, or possibly other types of problems, it is reccomended you use this 7 step method to solve it efficiently and effectively, but the success of the solution ultimately depends on the user him/herself.

Step I - Background Research

Background research is the fundamental part of any solution. It is advised that you keep a record of possible times when problems could happen, and when times are the bst for you to take action for a bit of freedom. Records of successful and failed solutions are also advisable to be kept as it gives the user a rough guide to what kind of solution he/she should use.

Step II - Identify

Identifying the problem is the basic part of any problem solving. You can't solve a problem if you don't know what it is.

Step III - Find Links

Finding links to the problem makes solving it much easier. You can find out what led to the problem, or what the problem could lead to if it goes unsolved. It gives a sense of urgency to the user and also provides much more information on how the problem could be solved.

Step IV - Check

Checking is very important. You check your available resources and tools to solve the problem, and check that your movements are not being monitored except by your most trusted. If any information leak through, you are done for. You need to check on everything you have which can help in solving the problem so as to make it easier.

Step V - Plan

This is the critical part of the problem solving. Plan out your details to solve the problem, if its long term or short term or blast. Put in all your knowledge and background research and available tools and select the best way and methods to solve the problem. This is a part which experience is very important, so don't sulk if you fail in the earlier tries, experience will be gained. (more details on planning to be released soon...)

Step VI - Execute

Follow according to plan and do what it says. If things do not go as expected, try to change it slightly and make it up as you go. Also, this requires experience, so do not feel discouraged if you fail in the first few tries. (more details on executing to be released soon...)

Step VII - Analyse and Record

If the plan goes correctly, record it down, to remember what you did right and what can be improved to make future similar problems so much easier to solve. If it failed, ask yourself questions about how and why it failed and find out problems to it and solve it again, so as to ensure you do not make similar mistakes again. And the analysis and records goes into your background research and the chain starts all over again.


Thats about it for today, and more to come in the next posts...so stay tuned...comments and suggestions are welcomed in the tagboard...

Monday, March 24, 2008

I'll let you see through your life...

yo its been seriously long since i posted any poetry...but its just for the fun of writing its not to get damn A.A.'s shit attention like the black shit and wayne...

but first let's post about the day...just like any1 else...today quite sianz...pe slacking was fun though...walked...jogged...talked and play played...and chinese was storytelling as usual...and really BEDTIME STORIES...slacked through maths also...

went home with veron...since no other would resort to their prisons so quickly...or if it can be prison in your way but it is in mine...so i don't blame you guys...why go to prison so early if you can stay out of it longer? but alas...some unfortunates...not only me...as many other are much worse...have to abide by the orders and sadly take leave from their fellow free friends and head on to a long and lonely road to their imprisonment...

i recently got myself a new toy...and its been quite a while* since i got one (see The Prisoner's Book of Language, By Chen Wei Heng, for more details) and its a high tech gun like penknife, which can slice through thick plastic with ease, but i have not tried metal, but if it can marr plastic, it sure can to flesh and blood...hehehe...


So eh...don't get too freaked out when you see me playing with it...cuz Wen Xin and Xiaowen saw me twirling the exquisite weapoin in my hands and they resorted immediately to a futile attempt to stop my soon would be suicide...hahaha...

ok after so much of my talks and boring testimonies which you weaklings are too blessed to experience to fully understand my situation and jiajian's and many other people out there...i will make some writings, simple ones mind you, to let you understand our situation and therefore reduce misunderstanding amongst us and make peace between all...and others who suffer can also convey their thoughts and opinions here through my tagboard...so everyone gets a fair fighting chance...and recently i got this idea to put something similar on the school forum...which would rapidly spread the understanding..but thats not soon...and it will take lots of preparation...

and i'm aware if any teacher got wind of that, and if any teacher conveys the message to them through the parent teacher conference...hoho...let's not think about that..

ok back to the painful reality...and not imaginations and wonders of maybe impossible scheming and fighting for our right to live free...

today sat at the back of the class and discussed with xw how the class might be after 10 years...and its pretty funny...but i shall not go on to the finer details yet but we do know some will have their sweet rides and some may look conpletely different due to removal of rules and stiff...but let's not talk about that now...we males have 2 years of NS to go through and its at least 7 years till just maybe i will get my freedom...just MAYBE...







It is said that learning will accompany you through life...just like huo2 dao4 lao3, xue2 dao4 lao3...and even though we are not old and withered, we are in the midst of learning, and learning much more than we normally should and do, and i've just finished learning a simple concept, which is xian1 ku3 hou4 tian2, which i saw wonders in it after doing a large bulk of my hw during the weekends and saw the wonders of not worrying about homework while gunbound and trickster music rings in my ears...haha...

Since i'm afraid to lose your attention after such a long post (for you but not for me, as you may not actually have the patience to browse through the opinions of an inferior lack of freedom man...) i'm going on the the poetry..hah...

Respect Your Enemy

Ok let's take it this way,

You two decide to finish each other off,

Ok, let me do the say,

Everybody not a sound, not a cough.

You two, face each other here,

No getting too violent, cause' its not time yet,

Say hello without any fear,

Cause' maybe its the last that he may get.

Shake his hand, don't mind,

Even though you may curse behind,

So just make it quick, one last time,

Before either steps on the mine.

Walk to the end of the arena, face set,

As you are about to fight an honourable man,

Honorouble, yes, you can bet,

As enemies are the ones which makes you a man.

Smile and draw your guns, split second,

Decision,

So let's do your stuff and show him what'you got.

So now, resist the cheat and dirty play temptation,

Otherwise things will look ugly if you are caught.

Call him by his proper name, no name-callin',

And acknowledge him to be your rival,

Honour him to get on the likes of your hate,

But give him no chance of survival.

Ah, hear the sweet music, of gunshots renting the air,

For there is none as such this fair,

But for such honour there's one rule,

Respect your enemy, its so true.

I know its nothing much compared to my previous works...but it just popped into my mind somehow and i just got those words..so...let's end this post...

Casual Writings by me and JJ, to be published on our blogs...

I - Dictionary of the Chainball

Comparison of words and phrases used by different people with different backgrounds and lives. Excellent guide to understanding what JJ and me is talking about.

II - Theories of the Caged

Many phsycological theories about how and why people behave in the way they do which so intrigued me and JJ. Also includes reasons why such theories are true.

III - Guide To Surviving the Extremes

An excellent guide to how to survive lives like mine, jj's and many other unfortunate people out there. Recommended for all as you'd never know when disaster strikes when your parents got to know mine.

Thats about it...thanks and stay tuned to broken-hourglass.blogspot.com...

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Apologize for a new start

hey all...i'm here to apologize about that contradicting post which probably made all of you unhappy or angry also...so i deleted it...

hey all...i'm sorry for that post and the rash words and meaning inside it but it was a moment of impulse when i posted all that stupid stuff...i didn't mean any of it and now when i look at it, it indeed is very insensitive...

i posted all that stupid stuff out of impluse ... but that blaze had now passed and its over... i'm sorry to all once again and i hope you don't take those foolish words against me...

thanks for all the tags though...i appreciate it but i believe it needn't happen if i was better at controlling my rage and not letting my mood affect my attitude towards my friends...(even though my parents always let the stock market or company status affect their attitude to me...)

I'm sorry once again and i promise it won't happen again...

I'm sorry to justin sim too...it was not intentional and it was only a moment of outburst when i said those foolish things...

I'm sorry to all who had been offended by all my actions in this period of damn time, when things don't go well and smoothly, but i admit i'm a lousy bastard at controlling how i feel and i emo too much and most of the time offend others or make other uncomfortable or unhappy or angry and stuff...so i'm sorry again and i would not let it ever happen again...

I'm sorry to all who i had unwittingly insulted or offended for being what they do best, and being themselves, seriously its my own little error in mispredicting what could happen...so i need to learn more...

So let's put this behind us and get on to a new start, with a new mindset, a new attidude...

Previous Mindset - I must find methods to defy them and make others believe that they are very happy and must let non believers suffer the pain too.

New Improved Mindset - I must learn from the other happy people and therefore thank them and appreciate their time and patience for teaching me excellent methods in improving my freedom.

So now...i know that after misunderstanding all you ppl's good intentions, i shouldnt ask for more but i require your secrets to your happiness and freedom...so teach me, i am willing to learn...so all will be much better...

Tell me your secrets and i will tell you mine to how to survive in extreme conditions...

I'm willing to learn from my masters and soon enough i will be as good as them (you) so please if you do not mind spend a little bit of time telling me about your methods to your success in freedom and i will appreciate it a lot...

Thanks to all and sorry once again for that post...

Seriously its my fault but i will try my best to make it not so, and not let any problems happen which eventually lead any someone's fault...

Sunday, March 16, 2008

nightmare of march 14th

Nightmare of March 14th



End of the World



Chapter I - Red



Its was chaos. Everything was bathed in crimson light, as the many supposedly extinct volcanoes erupted at the same time, spewing ash into the atmosphere and lava into densely populated towns, burning houses, destroying buildings, and everything. He stumbled and ran, and ran. But the cloud of ash and carbon was closing in, and he fell to the ground, awaiting burning hot lava to melt him any second, or preparing himself to inhale breaths of lung destroying carbom monoxide. He shuddered in sweat and closed his eyes, just pleading for a miracle to save him, and whispered something inaudible as all around him, mountains of exploding magma and clouds of ash and dust with crimson illumination changed the familiar landscape of the peaceful town, terribly. But just as suddenly as it began, it stopped.
The tons of magma ejected into the air froze suddenly, and turned into solid rock, and broke into millions of pieces as they fell to the ground, all in one fluid motion. As tiny pieces of hot rock cascaded upon the stricken land, the rage of the disaster seem to stop, like a fire which is melting slowly and dying out. Soon enough the small stinging burning on his back stopped, and he stopped shuddering in fear.

Chapter II - Blue

Soon enough, that blazing heat and stinging pain on his scarred back disappeared. And the thunderous noise of the eruptions and cracking of the rocks stopped., to be replaced by something completely new, rain. As the flaming red of the sky get replaced by a cool crystal blue, and cool waves of rain began cascading upon the ruined town. He got up shakily to his feet and shook his wet hair out of his eyes, slowly taking in so much which had just happened. He spluttered, tripped on a piece of a blown up house, and stumbled into the burning wreck of the town, looking for his family and friends. Quickly he found them, and together with the rest of the little town a small caravan of tattered trucks headed out to the city miles and miles away. To their relief the city was unaffected by the disaster. Quickly he and his family brought some provisions and together with a gang of his friends, had a meal at the local cafe, celebrating the end of the disaster. But all the time, even though the rain of relief fell, a strange blue hue seemed to engulf everything, the sky, the roads, and even his vision was turned to a shade of light and dark blue, and everything seemd to shine softly like crystal, as if he was wearing a pair of blue sunglasses, even though he was not. But fun and laughter was not made to last.

Chapter III - Black
As he left the cafe, something more menacing than the volcano struck his eyes. A swirling pit of dark mass was right above the city, a black hole. And everything is sucked into it, and he could only stare on in horror at the end of the world as everything is devoured into nothingness. And he lost everything he ever had and ever wanted...

Chapter IV - Green
He woke sweating, heart beating fast, and could almost still see the black hole as it swirled above the earth. A shadow passed his eyes, and for the first time he realised how bright the sun shone and how green the trees and grass were...