Someone of paradoxes and contradictions.
Somehow a part of it, but never truly a participant and a propagator.
In contact often, but in reality isolated.
Enjoys solitude, but worries about company.
Feet on two boats, but falling into the sea.
Too many things have two sides to it, and indecisiveness ensues.
I can never make a decision the same way again, without so much internal struggle.
It's not loneliness, not frustration, not even anger.
It's a strange feeling indescribable by words alone.
You need to feel it yourself to understand what I mean.
I don't even know what to make of it anymore.
I hate this shit. I fucking hate this shit.
