Hellos...its been a few days since the last post..how are you all doing? Getting well after receiving those dreadful results? Hope you are...otherwise end up like me...having to struggle through every painful moment...
Today tried to chiong IT but then got ppl book the lab again...just like yesterday so had to go early lor...sianz...but then Ms Huang postpone deadline so nvms...
How was PlayFunTime at Anthony's house today?Fun?Enjoyable?Or did something happen while i am not there?lols...
Even though I may seem very perturbed by the painful fact of reality that most of you can have fun while i can't...but i'm trying to change that...with the thought that since my friends are having fun and feeling happy...i should feel happy for them and not sulk and be jealous of the amount of excessive freedom which is happily presented to them in large quantities and of which i am so deprived of...
But even so as i try...this lingering feeling of unease and discomfort still remains to protect the very bit of jealousy and hatred still within me...I'm holding back my remorse and retorts...but anger and frustration would soon overtake me entirely...
JJ Chim,my only source of comfort and reassurance...you share my pain and point of view...
I still wonder in awe sometimes why are most of you so much more priveledged and while i am not given the chance to express myself...this is wonder and interest at the first time and in the first place...but slowly to be replaced with regret,rage,remorse,dissapointment,sorrow,anger and unhappiness...
What matters most now in this world in most people's view are to be as good as others...while not to be as good as yourself...others are the ones who bring you up and down...
I find it hard to accept the truth that I would never find happiness...unlike the many fortunate others around me...and I feel happy for them =)...and yet it would not work out as well as i thought=(...
"Face the cruel reality that is life"
-Jazz
"Life is fun and enjoyable and we should make happiness out of it if we can"
-The Others
I am not the others...
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